Running on Empty

A couple of years ago I was eager and set to impact the world. I was working at a bible camp and had the mindset that I was going to pour into everybody and anybody who was there. I was going to be a spiritual mentor to my staffers as well as a caring shepherd and teacher to all those students entrusted under my care each week. I knew it would difficult, but if anyone could do it, I knew it was me. I was as close to Superman as the next guy and believed in myself so much. It was going to be a remarkable summer. I would leave feeling like a king for doing the work of Christ every minute of the summer all summer long.

About mid-June I started to lose it. I was constantly tired, always crabby, I was filled with bitterness and resentment at how hard I was working and why I had to do more work than everyone else, I felt under-appreciated, and I was scared. I remember feeling so exhausted I would just lie face down on the floor and sleep after a long day. I was terrified that I was experiencing all these negative emotions and was only two weeks into the summer season; I was literally running myself into the ground.

Then came one fateful afternoon after our Day Campers left after their week program where I lost it. I literally went crazy and lost all control of who I was for about 90 minutes. I ran around like a chicken with my head cut off, talking but not making any sense, I was a wild child, knowing exactly how I should act but not being able to do anything about it. It was terribly embarrassing but my nerves and emotions finally snapped and I couldn’t do anything. My director pulled me aside and forced me to sit down so we could talk after the incident and I lost it again, this time though instead of being wild I just bawled. I bawled and I bawled and I just wanted to rest.

Good Intentions Bad Results

I wanted so badly to be Superman that summer that I disregarded my own walk with Christ for a large portion of the summer and in the end I paid for it. It was a hard lesson for me to learn, sometimes trying to be as selfless as possible is bad for you. If you continually neglect your own health (physically, mentally, emotionally, or spiritually) in order to help someone else eventually it will come back to you. After all you do your best ministering when you are insynch with God and that happens when your cup is full. In my attempt to be put everyone ahead of myself I let my own cup run empty and didn’t bother to try to fill it. I thought I could help people enough to get it back to where it needed to be. Life doesn’t necessarily work that way though.

As parents, knowing when to say yes and when to say no, is an important and critical truth to establish in our lives. As our children grow up we continue to work hard all day and then come home to minister and pour ourselves out at night. We have to know when to fill ourselves up so that when we do minister, support, love, and pour ourselves out we are more able to do so in a godly way. Otherwise, we run risk of growing bitter and angry with them, all because we didn’t take time to rest ourselves.

Filling up on Holy Spirit

Everyone is going to be filled and energized to do God’s wondrous work in different ways. I don’t believe there is any “one-size fits all” model but I do believe somethings are more inclined to help you feel God work. It’s important for you as a parent to explore different options and ways so that when your running on empty you know just what to do. For someone it might be going into nature and being surrounded by God’s creation through a walk and prayer time. For someone it might be plugging away on a guitar and just relaxing in the presence of God. For someone else it could be taking time to just sit and read and be still. Be confident in how you fill yourself up, God created you how you are, so don’t compare apples to oranges. There’s a chance what fills you spiritually also fills your spouse and that’s great; there’s also a chance what fills you spiritually doesn’t fill your spouse and that’s okay too. Do what you need to do to be filled so that in time you can out-pour yourself to your family, friends, and co-workers and then take time to rest, eat, and be filled again.

God is good. He will provide for you. He will fill you up. Take time to not only teach those around you but also to teach yourself. Be still and listen to God in the busyness of today. Christ showed us the power of being selfless in everything He did in life, but remember, even Christ would leave the masses after a while to be one-on-one with God and fill His own cup. Let us do the same and let us by the Grace of God do His work the way He designed us too, at one with Him.

A Father’s Day Toast!

Father’s Day is a special day, a time for fathers across the world to kick their feet up, sit back in their recliners, drink a beer and enjoy a day of being appreciated for all their work they do for their families day-in and day-out. After all, fatherhood is tough job that can bring even the manliest men crying and retreating out of the lives of their family. You’ve worked hard all day long in an attempt to provide your family with everything they need. You come home after a long day and pour yourself out teaching and loving your children. You give yourself fully to your wife and love her as Christ did for the Church. You lead your family through the ups and downs of life, taking the spiritual reigns of the house so that you can guide them closer and closer to Christ. It is a tough job and today you get to feel appreciated for all the work you’ve done. Here are some words to encourage you and get you through the tough times.

1. You are appreciated. You are so appreciated as a father and the work and love you give to your family. In a society where fatherless homes are more and more common, the simple fact that you are there is changing the lives of your family in a way that could never happen in your absence. When you add the fact that you are actively and passionately serving your family know that you are so loved and appreciated. You taking the time and energy to provide for your family and then serving them is having a bigger impact than you realize. It’s sending the message to your children and wife that you love them and believe in them and that changes lives. Never forget how appreciated you are to your family. We forget to say how we feel time to time, so allow me personally to say I appreciate you and am praying for you.

2. You are not alone. Sometimes as men we can struggle with pride and that’s a very dangerous thing. Pride stops us from asking for help, seeking guidance, and puffs us up to think we are invincible. There are a couple key people we need to continually remind ourselves that they are on our team and in our corner. Wife: She’s wonderful isn’t she? She would do anything for us and will love us and give us the same love and grace that Christ would. Don’t keep her in the dark. If you’re overwhelmed with things go to her, bring her up to speed on what’s going through your head. She will walk confidently beside you wherever you go and will help any way she can, let her help. Church: We are here for you! It seems weird sometimes like well what are you suppose to help me with? But we are, it’s our job to equip you and guide you when it comes to getting through the hard times. If you need help leading your family spiritually or struggling with something and in need of prayer or counseling we are here to get you through so that you can better reflect Christ. Jesus: Our wonderful Savior, Friend, Counselor, Healer, and Giver is with us and inside of us. He sent His Holy Spirit to dwell with us and you can trust that He will be there for you. Lean on Him and His ways and trust in His divine plan and it will prove to be enough time and time again. He is worth of your praise and will provide for you, whether it’s physically, mentally, emotionally, or spiritually He will never leave you hanging.

3. You are making a difference. If you are ever stuck in a rut wondering if you’re doing anything right know that you are. You were called to lead your family and through Christ you are being continually built up and empowered to do just that! We do need to also continually remind ourselves that the greatest thing we can do for our families is not providing, but loving. You are making a difference but never forget the primary responsibility to your family. Time will past and your children will forget the things you bought them but they will never forget the love you gave them and the time you invested in them. Your top priority in making a difference is loving them and putting them first, sometimes that means working and sometimes that means saying no to work to be with them. They will appreciate the time more than anything else. No matter what though, rest assured that you are in fact doing a great job in the chaos of life and you are making a wonderful difference.

So take a break! Enjoy some time to reflect on the last year and where God has brought your family and get ready for another exciting year ahead. Wherever you end up always remember those simple truths though: you are appreciated, you are not alone, and you are making a huge difference!

The Fruit of The Spirit: Kindness

²² But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ²³ gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

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Stretching, Laughter, and Kindness

Some things in life just seem to be more contagious than others and I’m thankful for that. As I look back on my time as a competitive runner I remember stretching in a large group before runs and how contagious stretching was. I would be standing there stretching my arms and reaching out as far as I could thinking well I think this is all I need to do, just then I’d look up and see someone doing some lunges and I would quickly realize I hadn’t done those yet and kneel down to start doing my own. Mid-way through a lunge, I’d look over at someone else doing a butterfly stretch and I would then drop to my butt to stretch groin with the butterfly and then everyone around me would be doing the butterfly. I’ve experienced the same thing while watching comedies. I may not laugh much on my own but if the person I’m watching with laughs there’s a greater chance that I will laugh too.

I’m thankful that kindness has that same affect on us.

Kindness in the Gospel

As we look at the life and times of Jesus we see the path He walked was founded on kindness (and all the other Fruit of the Spirit that work together in unison) which changed the lives of everyone He came across. Whether He was giving redemption and a second chance to Zacchaeus, the woman at the well, the adulteress woman, or any number of His disciples who would later reject Him.There was love, there was grace, and there was kindness, and that’s because they all work together so beautifully. We demonstrate kindness to those who we love, Jesus did the same, only His capacity to love was infinite.

Christ, in His time on earth loved the rich, poor, man, woman, father, child, prostitute, thief, liar, and alike. Which made every action He had with everyone one that showed His wonderful kindness. The whole point of the Gospel is displaying God’s love for us by having Christ willingly take our wicked punishment for our sins on His shoulders til the point where He sacrificed His life. An act of love that demonstrates His kindness and how much He cares about us. That act changes us from the inside out, just as it did His disciples, they wanted to show that same love, grace, and kindness to everyone around them. It was contagious when they experienced and it’s contagious today.

Kindness in Our Lives

It’s important to know what’s contagious in life because people who are around us will rub off on us and we will rub off on them. This is key when realizing the impact our lives have on our children. How we uphold our selves, treat those around us, talk about those present and absent, is subconsciously telling our children how they should behave. You are your children’s superhero. You are the one they want to be like. They want to have your job, like the things you like, eat the foods you eat so they can be strong like you are. Your children will mimic your words, your mannerisms, your actions, and that is precisely why it’s important we think about them. It can be overwhelming. Luckily Christ is with us each step of the way, because in the end it’s not our kindness that we want to show to the world, it’s His; and in the end it is His grace extended to us that lets us breath a sigh of relief when we fall short. It is His love, grace, and kindness that we want our children to cling too and it is His Fruit of the Spirit that can be seen in us when we follow His steps and let Him guide us.

The point isn’t to focus on being kind or perfect; the point is to focus on Christ. It is only through Him that we can demonstrate who He is. We are the only Jesus that many people encounter and the biggest influencers in our children’s lives. Follow Christ then because it’s the most important thing we can do for our children; follow His love, grace, joy, peace, and kindness with all that you have and let His Fruit and His kindness be displayed through you.

Our Last Meal on Earth

Our Own Green Mile

“And I think about all of us walking our own green mile… …each in our own time.” – The Green Mile

I’ve been reflecting on this quote for a couple days and really letting it resonate within me. The quote comes The Green Mile, a movie that stars Tom Hank as the head of Death Row during the Great Depression. He’s reflecting on his life and the lives of those that have come to pass and comparing them to those same lives he used to oversee as they waited until their death and took their final walk down the Green Mile to the execution chair. He decided we’re all walking our own Green Mile, some people’s last longer, but the same fate awaits us both.

As I pondered this thought and examined my life a lot of things faded out and a lot of things focused in. I guess when you examine the shortness of life and the importance of each day, binge watching the newest Netflix show seems pretty trivial. Life is short, it’s often compared in the Bible as a mist, a vapor, a shadow, and so on. When we take that mindset up it allows us to truly focus on the important things in our lives.

The Final Meal

As I reflected on walking my own green mile I quickly thought of what happens just before the last walk. That final meal. I’ve thought about it a lot over the years, what my last meal would be and finally I came across my answer. I didn’t care and truly I don’t. For me it’s always been less about what I’m eating and more of who I’m with. Family and friends have truly changed my life and God has used them at every stage of my life to get me through, speak wisdom, love me, encourage me, support me, and many times God has used them to show me His own characteristics.

When we reflect on the shortness of life I think we’d all have the same response as I had to our last meal and why wouldn’t we? If we asked those same people in the movie or in real life, they would agree with us in a heartbeat. Wouldn’t we all trade in an expensive steak dinner with all the fixings by ourselves for a final meal with the ones we love best, even if it was something as simple as a ham and cheese sandwich and some potato chips?

So What Are We Doing?!?!

I grew up in a family where everyone was on the go. Sometimes we went places that mattered like practices or work and other times we just went to our rooms, but sometimes we would enjoy eating together while watching tv. It wasn’t until I grew up and started appreciating and desiring things like being with my family that I realized we never took time to do them together. The children of the house didn’t want to be around the parents and the parents didn’t want to force us so we did our own thing and once in a blue moon we would gather together around a nice meal and actually talk about our lives. I wish I was a minority in that upbringing but as the world speeds up and kids grow up faster it seems just the opposite. This way of living is more and more normal and it won’t be until it’s to late (when the kids have graduated and left, when at the hands of death we lose a loved one) that we will truly realized what we missed out all those times when we could have been together.

Recent studies show that parents have just under 40 minutes of meaningful conversation with their children each week. It averages to be just over 5 minutes a day truly building and encouraging your children and knowing how their life is. They also show an increase in grades and a decrease in deviant behavior or problems whether it be eating disorders or drugs. It all stems from being in an engaging and positive setting. Besides the statistics, eating together allows you to better ministry and get to know your children because it gives you extra bonding time together every day to recount how your days are going and what’s going on in your lives.

Eating together will take more time, more discipline, and work but I assure you it is worth it. Life is to short to let the small moments like enjoying a meal with the ones we love closest to slip by every day. So as you walk your own green mile alongside your family don’t be afraid to go above and beyond and make the most out of every day you have with each other.  Because truth be told, we don’t know how much time we have and if you’re not careful you could experience your last meal by yourself instead of with your loving family.

Summer Bathtubs and Summer Oceans

“If then you have been raised up with Christ, keep seeking the things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your mind on the things above, not on the things that are on earth.” – Colossians 3:1-2

Summer is a wonderful time. Most students begin the countdown to when summer starts at approximately the exact same moment that they realized t’s over. Needless to say summer is very refreshing for all of us after a busy year (especially students). Summer gives us a chance for nice weather and being outside. It gives us the chance to lounge around just a little bit more. For students and children it’s all about staying up late, sleeping in later, and doing nothing they don’t want to do for three whole months. It relaxes and calms us in a way that only time away from our busy schedules does. However, this momentary breath of fresh air is only that, a moment.

Summer is a bathtub of grace, joy and peace. We have the ability to soak in it for a while and it feels great! We look forward to it, it relaxes us and takes our mind off our problems and allows us to escape ourselves. Unfortunately, after a while the hot water turns lukewarm and suddenly it’s not as relaxing. It’s not as fun. It’s not our escape. If you fight through that period of lukewarmness and try to continue to live in that moment, eventually the water will become cold and suddenly you realize you are lying in your own filth. Our paradise at first has slowly transformed into a prison. That’s because bathtubs aren’t meant to be lived in. They’re not suppose to be our main source of joy and our well for hope.

Summer allows us freedom and fun, but if we prioritize summer above God and use that freedom to self-indulge in ourselves we will never be truly refreshed. If we fall into the logic that summer is our well for hope and joy we will let summer consume us more and more and God less and less. We’ll start to get skimpy with our prayer life and neglect the Word of God and think it’s for our benefit after all what’s more refreshing reading the Bible or laying poolside? However, we will soon start to pay for our negligence to Christ through: shallowness, powerlessness, vulnerability to sin, preoccupation with trifles, superficial relationships, and a frightening loss of interest in worship and the things of the Spirit. Summer is a foretaste of heaven, but it will never and could never be a substitute for heaven.

Summer is a bathtub. Jesus is an ocean.  Jesus is an ocean of grace, joy, and peace that never runs dry and always overflows. He is at the center of all things, created all things, and sustains all things. It is He who calls out to us “Come to me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.” It is Him who can give us true rest and remove our burdens. It is Christ who faithfully and sacrificially laid His life down as a blameless, pure, and holy being through death by crucifixion so that we could freely accept the only grace and love that fills us. He is our ocean.

As we live in the moments of summer seeking refuge from the craziness that surrounds us, it’s vital to remember summer isn’t the freedom, it is Christ. Prioritizing time for Christ throughout summer will allow us true rest because we are using a glimpse of heaven with the power and love of giving Christ everything that takes us away from Him. Therefore if we look at the words of Colossians we can see the power of that mindset in summer. The mindset of remembering our prioritizes and not falling into the idolatry that summer is our hope and joy, because that will only lead to disappointment and emptiness. Putting our hope, anxieties, and faith in Christ and dwelling with Christ and seeking Christ is where we will find rest. We won’t find true rest by concentrating on the things of this world ever. It’s a valuable lesson we need to teach our children so they don’t fall in the empty patterns of the rest of the world. Because one thing is for sure, while we cannot live in the summer, we can live in Jesus.

Wait…Is Sunday School Over?

As the school year comes to a close so does our Children’s Ministry, or so at least it seems, right? Sunday School is on pause for the summer. Activities are slowing in the church and the summer festivals are starting to begin. The kids are excited for their favorite time of year. Summer break. Two and a half months of no learning, no school, and no classrooms. So as the school year comes to a close and students get a break from the routine of teachers and classrooms, ministry comes to a close for the year too right?

While it might appear like it’s the off-season, ministry never actually stops because we are always living life.  There is always something that needs to be done in our children’s lives. That’s why the summer is less of an off-season and more of a grand transition for us around the church. A grand transition because while we are preparing for the upcoming year and summer events, refocusing, recharging, and evaluating what we can improve on, ministry still needs to be done. Children are still growing up and they can’t afford to take an eighty day break from learning about Jesus.

An easy tendency and problem to fall into is believing that the primary and focal point of growing and learning about Christ happens in church.  As we fall into that thinking we believe that our children get their “fill” for Christ at church on Sundays and our children believe that the only time they grow is in the two hours (if that) that they are here. Unfortunately that leaves 166 hours a week where they don’t think they can grow or know Christ better. This is the transition, this is the great exchange where our children realize that they can learn, should learn, and will learn (and grow) in Christ outside of church.

Sunday School may be on pause but your child is still growing and we can work together during these transitions to help ensue that your child continue to grow in their relationship with Christ. Our goal is to empower you and guide you to take the reigns to lead and love just as Christ does for us. Here are some simple yet impactful ways to share Christ with your children during summer and then after the habit is made all year long.

1. Family Devotions – This is a great way to get the family involved in learning about Christ. You can do devotions every night before bed or start small by going once a week at a certain time. It will show your children how important it is that it’s a priority in your house as well as bonding the family together!

2. Praying before Dinner  – In today’s society it’s more common to get the food and split up and everyone eats individual or in front of the tv. Take time and eat together as a family and share your days together, before you do take turns praying to God. It’s a great way to empower children as they pray out loud at home they will begin to gain confidence to pray out loud in groups and more importantly giving thanks to God for providing.

3. Reading together – Find a time daily or weekly to sit down as a family and simply read your bibles together. What better way for our children to see and feel the importance of scripture than to see their parents reading scripture and talking about what they read? They will grow a lot by this simple act and it will subtly help encourage a generation who reads less and less to pick up their bibles and read them!

There are tons of simple ways to engage your child’s faith and we hope that this summer you will take advantage of the opportunity to really pour into your children as we prepare for the upcoming events. We are a tool at your disposal. We want to encourage and equip you anyway we can, so if you ever have a question or need a resource let us know. We are here to help you lead well!

Palm Sunday Procession (Recap)

One of the most beautiful things about working with children is seeing their joy in the simple things and eagerness to be a part of something. We as a church got to see this this past Sunday during the Procession and it was a beautiful beautiful thing.

As they walked through the doors they were excited to grab ahold of a palm branch. They were smiling and having a great time. The real party started when the procession and march began though. The shy children waited patiently for us to come around to them so they could join in while the more rambunctious ones could been seen running down the isle saying “Watch out, I’m coming through!”

As we trotted around the church several times the children were loving life and being the center of attention. It was a blast. They waved their palm branches fearlessly in the air like they were Braveheart riding into battle. It was a very simple yet joy-filled moment that I believe really showed to an extent the celebration that was felt the first Palm Sunday. That Sunday was a marvelous celebration of Jesus arriving in Jerusalem.

The children were able to replicate it because of their childlike joy and that’s the beauty of children’s ministry. Their spirits are high, they are joyful, they are not afraid of acting crazy, they are not public trained yet, so their ability to cut-loose and recklessly worship Jesus is something that can inspire us. As they funneled into our line and followed us around the sanctuary going up-down-and-all-around they waved they waved their branches, smiles, laughed, waved at mom and dad, and got lost in the moment of what we were doing. We can learn a lot from worship by watching children dance and cut-loose. We forget that from time to time but I hope we can remember and learn from them.

We hope you all enjoyed our Palm Sunday Procession and look forward to celebrating Easter with everybody this weekend! Have a blessed week!